• How to be a person,  Uncategorized

    New Year, Same Me

    There’s a lot of pressure right now to be better. It’s the middle of winter here in the Northern Hemisphere, and I don’t know about you, but it’s not my most motivated time of year. After the flurry of Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years (with a few family birthdays sprinkled in), I’m not trying to change my whole life. I’m trying to find it again. We rush from one holiday to the next, outfitting our families in warm clothes, buying gifts, baking cookies and trying to keep the tree ornaments from being thrown like baseballs (or is that just my house?). We had a rough couple of days around the…

  • fairy tales

    Where are all the moms?

      The mother is nowhere to be seen in most fairy tales and fables. Fairy Tale Mothers (and some not so much…) In Cinderella, Snow White, Beauty and the Beast, and The Little Mermaid, the mothers were all dead, and in some, the fathers too. Even in (not so fairy) tales like Harry Potter, or Spiderman, their parents had both died. If Cinderella’s mom was alive… there would be no story to tell, but one of a happy girl with two loving, but poor, parents. If Snow White’s mother were around… the king would have never married the wicked stepmother. Snow would have led a charmed, adored life. Picture if Belle’s mother…

  • Uncategorized

    From Emotional Emergency to Real Self Care

      I’ve recently felt like I’m watching myself have a meltdown. Why does it take an Emotional Emergency to realize we need to take care of ourselves?  When the plumbing in our new-to-us 100 year old house was having issues, I learned to take baths. I haven’t been a bath person. Too long, too slow, what are you even supposed to do in there? Baths feel like I am on a timer and I don’t know how long is too long and I have a hard time relaxing. However, I refused to take a cold shower (brr!!) and so I was willing to fill the bath with hot water from the…

  • simplicity

    The Meditation of Hand-washing Dishes

    The clanging of ceramic and steel, my  toddler “helping” unload dirty dishes. Loading in the morning only to unload that night- the second load already beckons. The slimy, not-yet clean feeling of only-rinsed dishes as I quickly file them into place. These are not my favorite things. Hot steamy water, bubbly and inviting. A quiet kitchen- I’m left alone. A joining with every other woman who has washed dishes this way. A connection to my mother, my grandmother, my childhood. Rinsing in cool water, setting them to dry in a heap, dripping, layered on a towel. Every dish fits just so. A new soapy bath waits. There is no load…

  • Uncategorized

    How to work out when you hate working out

    Most of us agree that we should be working out, for various reasons. Many of us resolve to do it as part of our New Years resolutions, often making it to the list year after year. That being said, exercise is pretty much The. Worst. I mean, we could be reading books or baking delicious things or curled up under a blanket or ANYTHING ELSE that isn’t working out. Am I right? Unfortunately, when I live a life without movement, I limit myself. When my body isn’t used to moving around and being active because I don’t regularly pursue it (I really like to sit, guys) then when it is time…

  • Creativity

    oh hello, creativity

    Creativity is far from my mind. My soul is worn, my body is tired. We have spent many days this fall and winter in our new house, functioning at bare minimum. We eat out too much. We stay home in our comfy clothes. The kids play outside, and I warm myself with cup after cup of hot tea. The days feel long and dreary, rain dripping off of tree branches. Leaf covered ground soaked and slippery. I’ve been avoiding my writing. This week, I finished reading Marissa Meyer’s newest novel, Heartless. It was heavy and beautiful, heartbreaking. After reading it, I had those jealous writer feelings. Wishing that I had written that story, that idea,…